Divine Feminine vs. Wounded Feminine

Wounded feminine: the belief that in order for me to be bright, everyone else must be dim.

The Hidden Energy Shaping Your Life

In every interaction, whether it is in a corporate office, a TV set, or a Sunday brunch with friends, there is an invisible energy at play. We often hear about "feminine energy," but it is rarely discussed in its two most distinct forms: the Divine and the Wounded.

What is the Divine Feminine?

The Divine Feminine is a state of alignment and abundance. When a woman is operating from this space, she is magnetic. She doesn't need to shout to be heard or tear others down to feel tall. Her power is internal. She views other women as allies and understands that another person's success is not a threat to her own. She is the woman who opens doors, mentors others, and stays grounded even when chaos surrounds her.

What is the Wounded Feminine?

The Wounded Feminine is a state of misalignment and scarcity. This energy often stems from past trauma, insecurity, or the belief that there is "only so much room at the top."

When a woman is in her wounded energy, she may become the 'Queen Bee'. She might be performative: acting charming and sweet to men or authority figures while being cold or even hostile to women she perceives as rivals. This often manifests as:

• Selective Kindness: Being an angel to some but a bully to one specific target.

• Emotional Volatility: Using drama or exclusion to control an environment.

• Gatekeeping: Withholding information or resources to maintain feeling of superiority.

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I recently experienced this firsthand. I watched, what I will call, a "wounded feminine", perform selective kindness for every man in the room, only to turn around and scream at me, attempting to belittle my intelligence. It was a jarring moment which reminded me that a woman who is not at peace with herself will always try to disrupt the peace of those (who are aligned) around her.

When a woman screams at you while being an angel to everyone else, she is trying to label you as the problem to protect her own fragile status. It is the practice of venting internal insecurity by projecting it onto others through gossip, selective rudeness, and manufactured drama.

How to "Break the Social Chain" & protect your energy

In the movie Mean Girls, the girls are asked to apologize and trust fall into a crowd of their peers to be caught. This is a metaphor for moving from Scarcity to Community. To protect your energy when you encounter a Regina George in your professional or social life:

1. Don't Join the Plastics: Don’t try to win her over by changing who you are. The moment you start "performing" to fit her hierarchy, you’ve left your Divine alignment.

2. Recognize the Mask: Remember that Regina’s "perfection" was a mask for deep-seated fear. When someone is extra rude to only you, they are essentially telling you that you have something they are afraid of losing.

3. Be the "Cady" who stays herself: Cady only found peace when she stopped playing the game and went back to her authentic, grounded self.

The Energy alignment Audit

Are you the girl cheering for your colleagues, or are you the one holding the Burn Book? Use this 20-question deep dive to find out where you land on the spectrum.

Whether you’ve been the Regina, or the target, the path forward is the same:

Release, Align, Glow. 

Healing the Wounded feminine is realizing that the crown isn't limited. There is enough success, beauty, and attention for every woman in the room.